“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.”
~C. S. Lewis
Big things happen in life — your company “divorces” you, a loved one passes on, a cheating husband is caught — big things. Your world as you know it turns upside down and you lose all sense of well-being. You’re thrown off balance. You get knocked down by a curve-ball. Your old dreams are shattered.
These life-changing events will likely trigger a lot of emotion, such as fear, anger, blame and grief, among others. When you feel these raw emotions, it can bring up a sense of insecurity, hopelessness and wonderment about who you are now that things are changing.
A Life Transition
A transition is an event that causes us to re-evaluate our present circumstances and consider how we must adapt to the new normal. It causes us to change—profoundly.
Sometimes you can see these events coming and prepare for them. At other times, you can be blind-sided by them.
What I know for sure is that they keep coming, whether you want them or not, whether you’re prepared or not, whether you try to prevent them or not. That’s life.
It’s by grand design. I don’t know of anyone who gets through this life unscathed. It’s how we learn. It’s how we grow.
What Defines Us
If I’ve learned nothing else in my work, I’ve learned this: how we face these major shifts in our lives is what defines our character and makes each of us unique. It also defines how successfully we move forward.
Do you tremble at the first sign of change and resist it at all cost? Or, do you wobble at the impact at first, then quickly right yourself and move on? Maybe you welcome the opportunity that change offers you and look for the silver lining every time?
Everyone handles transition differently, and depending on the magnitude of the change, you might tremble at one and welcome another. You may be able to handle the first one or two on your own, and when the next one hits you realize you’ve just been going through the motions.
It may be time to dream a new dream.
How We Can Thrive Through Change
Whether you like the change or not, accepting the new situation is always a good first step. You don’t have to like it. If you don’t want to stay stuck in limbo, accepting the fact that things are changing is a very mature way to move forward.
From that place, you can honor all the emotions that come up. Just because you’re accepting the change doesn’t mean there will be no emotions. Of course there will.
You’ll still get angry—sit with that and let it work it’s way out. Choose how you want to feel instead. You may also feel scared. Learn to reframe the fear so it doesn’t stop you in your tracks. Loneliness may come up. Think of ways to fill your time so you minimize the lonely feelings.
Make plans. Act on those plans. Take small steps at a time and feel the satisfaction that comes with making progress.
I love what C.S. Lewis said …
“You are never too old to set another goal or to dream a new dream.”
It reminds me, that my dreams may get shattered at times in my life, and I can always create a new dream. It’s a choice I get to make. I could wallow in the loss of the old dream or I could design a better one—one that suits my current vision. It also reminds me to never lose sight of my dreams. I get to set new goals and dream a new dream whenever life happens to me.
That’s a comforting notion.
Dream a New Dream
I believe when we set a firm foundation for those dreams, it will support us in many ways. Think of it as a three-legged stool on which you can sit and never topple.
Values—Vision—Passion for Action. When you are well grounded in what you value most for your life—and use those core values to guide every choice and decision—have a crystal–clear vision of what you want for your future—supported by those values—and act with passion to make the dream happen, you will turn coping and surviving into thriving.
That’s how you thrive through change. Simple, yes. Easy, no. And you get to choose the path you want to take. Is it time to dream a new dream?
Step Onto Your Bridge
When life-changing moments flip your world upside down, I create a bridge so you can turn chaos into calm. You build resilience and learn to live a life guided by your own values and vision. Are you ready to take the first step onto your bridge? Do you want to explore how change can impact you? Would you like to learn how to move through it with more dignity and grace? I’m here to help. Get my free ebook From Darkness to Light: Learning to Adapt to Change and Move Through Transition.
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